electric mist

feeling good

There are some days, like today, that are such a gift. Nothing earth shattering, nothing movie-of-the-week. Just wonderful moments, time spent with Carl, curled up in bed or laughing at something together. There has been more and more of that lately, and I am in awe.

I never really thought I'd get here, in this place, at this time. And it was one of those rare moments when I wasn't thinking, "I'd be happy if _____" where that blank might be "my novel sells" or "the movie gets made" or "I lost another ten pounds" or "the kids were completely settled" or any of a thousand things that flow around us daily, rushing me toward some goal or other. There will always be one more goal, one more thing to do. But I never thought I'd be here. Capable of real happiness, contentment.

Are there things to stress over? Thousands. I still haven't finished that damned synopsis. (A sentence which I just told Diane will probably be on my tombstone.) There are always things to be done with the construction business. Always things the kids need.

I have no doubt the pod person which has taken over my body will leave abruptly and the grumpy curmudgeon will resurface, but I'm enjoying the pod life for today. It's been good and I wanted to remember that there really are days like this.