Carl (husband) decided to wrap a few presents. Whenver Carl has possession of anything like scissors and tape, certain animals in our house should know to be afraid. Unfortunately, the cat is as dumb as a bag of sticks, and I think that's probably an insult to sticks everywhere. So a little while later, I find Carl, by himself, in the living room, chuckling. Not a good sign.
Me: What are you doing?
Carl (a little too innocently): Wrapping.
Me: Where are the presents you've wrapped?
Carl: Um, over there.
He points to a sort of oblong present which is wiggling and has a cat paw sticking out of it.
Me: You wrapped the cat?
Carl: She kept sitting in the middle of the paper. So I figured she wanted to participate.
Me: And exactly how did she seem to take it?
Carl: Well, she rolled off the table, and she's got two paws out, so I'm thinking she's not entirely in the Christmas spirit.
A half hour later, she was out of the paper and attacking it, running away and then sneaking up on it again. Now he wants to tape a bow to her head. I'm not sure we're going to survive Christmas. She already hides in the tree and leaps out and pounces on anyone walking past. Which makes the tree wobble. I just know one day I'm going to walk in there and the entire tree is going to be on the floor with one very happy cat sitting to the side. All she'll need are the little bubble words over her head, saying, "Wrap that, you sucker."
Posted by toni at December 19, 2004 06:48 PMOooh...a wondefully evil idea.
Amazingly enough, your cat is dumber than mine. She's smart enough to run when the wrapping paper comes out. Damn!
Posted by: Christy at December 19, 2004 08:46 PMLOL. That's one thing I miss about the boys' cats. They never have figured out the whole how-to-get-the-bow-off-the-head thing. ;)
-G
Posted by: Garrison Steelle at December 19, 2004 09:14 PMi would love to have seen that - my cats love paper bags, and will be carried around in them like groceries by the kids. something about paper attracts them, i think...
Posted by: miyna at December 19, 2004 10:04 PMI found you by way of BE and I've just finished reading several of your posts. I am proud to say you have now been added to my blogroll. :)
Posted by: FTS at December 19, 2004 10:41 PMMy cats have been either remarkably smart or very sensitive about what's in their own self-interest. They wouldn't go near wrapping paper OR bows.
Posted by: Anne at December 20, 2004 08:21 AMI thought I was the only one with a cat that dumb ;) Thanks for sharing that story, made me laugh :D
Posted by: Natasha at December 20, 2004 10:16 AMVery funny.
My cats ADORE Christmas. I often find ribbons all over the place -- tied around the legs of the chairs, hanging from the lamps . . .
Posted by: Devon at December 20, 2004 01:09 PMThat's too funny!
Posted by: Empress at December 20, 2004 05:35 PMLOL.. Reminds me of this site a friend just sent to me!! http://www.fluffytails.ca/christmas.asp
Posted by: Rev. Dr. Spyder X at December 20, 2004 06:06 PMOMG! Your husband WRAPPED THE CAT?!?!??!?! ROTFLOL for real! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA that's awesome!!!!
Posted by: Toni at December 20, 2004 09:57 PMGood grief, if my cat ever figures out how to climb the tree like in that link in Dr. Sypder's comment, we are so dead. She really is so dumb that she doesn't realize she can climb.
And yes, he really and truly wrapped her. I heard him contemplating wrapping techniques with the older son, and one of them mentioned timing her, so I've hidden the tape. The cat, still too dumb, keeps going and sitting on the new wrapping paper, almost as if she's wanting to do it again.
Posted by: toni at December 20, 2004 11:30 PMHAHAHA!!!!!!!
Posted by: sally at December 21, 2004 12:14 AMI love your cat! She makes me like cats. :-) Funny husband. Hilarious story. You are a great blogger!
Posted by: Sparkle at December 22, 2004 01:29 AM